Monday, June 03, 2013

The Oppenheimer Report - 6/3/13

Last Wednesday marked the 19th anniversary of the day Shauna and I wed, and to commemorate the event Shauna put together a Facebook album of nineteen photos whose chronology spans the length of our relationship so far. I knew her back when I had hair, and it was black, not grey! One of the last photographs in the series was taken recently as we got our cars serviced at the local Honda dealer. How very romantic! But they say one picture speaks a thousand words, and what I see when I look at that photograph is contentment. I also see a codger. Shauna looks better than the day I married her, and I thought men got better looking with age. Not me ... I’m Festus. Let us have a brief moment of silence to acknowledge the swift passage of time. Most of all, that series of photographs reminded me of all that Shauna and I have seen and shared to this point. There is the photo of us standing outside Ron’s Fish N Chips in Blind River, Ontario where we had a delicious meal one hot summer night driving home from Banff. I remember meeting Ron and learning a little about his colorful life, and I remember photos lining the walls of his restaurant, showing Ron and his buddies on their many fishing adventures. There were the timer shots of the two of us on mountaintops overlooking the Bow Valley and the turquoise glacial lakes of Alberta, and British Columbia. Over the years, Shauna and I hiked hundreds of miles over the trails of the Canadian Rockies – no mean feat when one considers that Shauna has several chronic disabilities. There is the photo of a much younger (and wilder) me wearing a Lady Godiva wig at a party in Rochester, N.Y., making a silly face as the then unmarried Shauna looked at me with an embarrassed and confused smile, and perhaps just a smidgeon of disgust (I still get the same look from time to time). There is a timer shot of the two of us standing in her father’s boat in Katrine, with our 6’cardboard cutout Mountie “Dudley” whom we “liberated” from the Chateau Lake Louise one night after a long hike. We walked right through the main lobby of the hotel and into the parking lot with it. In that photo we were just about to go out on the lake and scatter some of her brother Jordan’s hair on the lake to commemorate his recent passing. Before he died he implored “Don’t postpone joy,” and that has been our motto ever since. Jordan had a great, albeit twisted sense of humor. One day, shortly after his unsuccessful brain surgery to remove a malignant tumor, he was sitting in a car waiting for his mother to come back from some store, and a vagrant came up to the window next to him and begged for money. Jordan rolled down the window, pulled off the bandana he was wearing to reveal a nasty unhealed incision on his head, and he said something like “I’d really like to help you out, but I’m saving up for my next surgery, and this time I think I’m going to let a doctor do it!” We brought Dudley along for comic relief. In fact there have been many photos of us taken with Dudley, from all across Canada, and he now stands in a place of honor overlooking our great room from the loft. Indeed we rescued him from his undignified sentry position outside an overpriced jewelry shop in the hotel. Mounties do not hawk jewelry. There is a photo of the two of us looking suntanned and relaxed, I believe standing outside a goofy restaurant called “Le Tub” in Hollywood, Florida. I remember the grounds of this restaurant were littered with old toilets and other bathroom fixtures and I also remember they were known for their burgers, if one could maintain one’s appetite.   
 
That photo series was a good idea, because it jogged my eroding memory. I find that as the years pass more quickly now, it is more important than ever to reflect back on the journey. Don’t live in the past, but certainly acknowledge it. Our marriage has not been perfect, what marriage is, but when I see these snapshots of time’s passage I am reminded how much richer the trip is with a companion. Thank you Boo for these past two decades, and I hope you can go all nine rounds with me, because it has been pretty interesting so far.   

Somebody mailed a letter to NYC Mayor Michael Bloomberg which was laced with the deadly poison ricin. It might have had something to do with Bloomberg’s stance as a gun control advocate. There has been an outbreak of a Sars like virus in Abu Dhabi which could become a worldwide threat. I remember how frightening it was when SARS surfaced in Toronto, and how it decimated the local Asian business community. Antibiotic resistant viruses scare the hell out of me. Is it the death of the Tea Party? U.S. Congresswoman Michele Bachmann has announced she won’t seek re-election. To me she and her TeaBagger buddies were the nail in the coffin of the Republican Party, but the elephants had been paralysed by boneheads and extremists long before the Teabaggers became a political force. Yet another super cell storm blew through Oklahoma last week on the heels of that devastating EF5 Tornado that leveled Moore. And finally, a moment of silence, Edith Bunker died! Actress Jean Stapleton (no relation to Maureen Stapleton) passed away last week at 90. I loved Edith. Comic genius.

Written by Jamie Oppenheimer c2013 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

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