The Oppenheimer Report - 12/5/11

Last week, I mentioned that we were in the process of rebuilding our pump house, and foolishly, I anticipated that the weather would hold out. This building project was delayed because our log guy had to work around hunting season. It’s hard to pull logs out of the woods when every hoser and his brother is out there shooting at anything that moves. Tuesday, in the teeming, cold rain we tore down about 2/3 of the old pump house and burned most of the wood in our fire pit by the lake. I brought the landscape trailer around to the front yard so that when we tore off the roof, I could trail the debris to the dump. I figured that we could finish the demolition on Wednesday and then reconstruction could begin this week. Wednesday morning, I woke up bright and early and whisked open the curtains to see that we were experiencing a blinding snowstorm. By 11AM, we had 8” of snow on the ground and most of the debris I was going to take to the dump was now buried. Funny, because radar showed a storm but forecasted that it would blow well south of Katrine. Unfortunately, predicted paths and actual paths are sometimes vastly different. Looks like we’re going to be doing some shoveling and I’m hoping that the lake effect storms off Georgian Bay don’t stray north and hammer us before this project is completed. We’ll be craning the logs down to the building site and that could be a little difficult in two feet of snow.

Herman Cain couldn’t take the heat so he got out of the kitchen. Indignant over the dirty Washington politics, he opted out of the Republican race last week. Apparently, his campaign manager didn’t properly vet him when it came to the part about skeletons in the closet. I have no idea whether Cain would have been a good candidate, but my guess is that if he couldn’t handle a little Washington mudslinging in the primaries, he probably would have folded if he made it to the big show. By the time the Washington press was finished with Ross Perot, he looked like a whiney flake. I liked Dana Carvey’s wonderful impression of Perot on SNL. Sadly, I fear elections have become more about who has the best spin doctors, and the candidates most capable to actually lead aren’t interested in doing the dance.

Out of curiosity and I suppose greed, the other day I participated in an online auction called Quibids. I’m sure some of you have heard of it. I was intrigued by all the ads telling me that someone had “won” a 46” TV for $2.50, and I wanted to see what was really going on. I don’t really need any more stuff in my already cluttered existence, but I was curious to see what the deal was. The way it works is as follows. First, you purchase bids. The minimum order is $60 for 100 bids. Once you have bids to spend you can go to the online auction and see what is up for grabs. This is not a site for people with a gambling problem, and I found myself down $30 within an hour, because I became swallowed up in the bidding process before I completely understood the proper strategy. The big ticket items are the hardest auctions to win, and there are a lot of hidden fees and service charges even if you do win. I procured a $10 Walmart gift card, but spent $2.40 in bids to get it and then there is an additional $2.99 in shipping charges. Not such a great deal. Bigger ticket items usually draw more bidders and as a novice, I quickly realized that some of those bidders are pros. Still, it is possible to get some big ticket items for a small fraction of their retail value if you get lucky or bid skillfully. I look at my $60 “investment” the same way I look at the money I fritter away at a slot machine in a casino. It’s not an intelligent way to spend money, but I try not to spend too much time assessing the value of my entertainment dollars. My buddy Bob and I spent a fortune on chamber of horror wax museums in Niagara Falls, and I would not say that was great value, but at the time, and under the influence of alcohol, I enjoyed myself. What is most interesting to me is to watch as bidding wars take place. Using programmed bidding - you can set the price at which you begin bidding and have a program automatically make as many bids as you chose - people often spend fifty to one hundred bids to win something, only to be sandbagged by some schmuck who just happens to get lucky and jump in at the end using only a couple of bids. I imagine a lot of bidders are looking for bargains for the holidays, so I’m guessing Quibids will do well this season. I heard that after Black Friday (why black?) and Cyber Monday, Americans had spent $52 Billion so far for holiday gifts. Do you think Santa uses Quibids? Everybody loves a deal.

Written by Jamie Oppenheimer c2011 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED