The Oppenheimer Report 12-10-12

Aunt Rose Shumacher, Syd, and Ethel Taylor

This week was a challenging one as we struggled to provide adequate care for my in-laws. At present, we are finally down in Toronto after a crazy week. It is our worst case scenario, the one about which we have been warning Shauna’s parents almost constantly for over a year now. Shauna was too sick to travel, I could not leave her, and now both parents are in the hospital. We came down to Toronto after Shauna’s oral surgery in Barrie, and hopefully, both parents will be released from the hospital soon. I suppose it is unrealistic to hope that old people, so used to living with their independence, will be proactive and cooperative about their health care needs. Regardless of who it is, we often hear the same excuse: “We didn’t want to be a burden on anyone; we don‘t need any help.” It is maddening, but I can’t really imagine what it’s like for them, so I shouldn’t be judgmental. Shauna is rightfully very worried about their well being, and she has been on the phone nonstop for four days trying to coordinate the necessary after care and therapy her dad will need. She is worn out because most of her energy is spent debating the need with her parents. No good deed goes unpunished.

There was some discussion last week on the news about global warming, and CNN, that bastion of liberal hogwash, reported that Republicans are more likely than Democrats to deny that global warming exists. I’d like to know from where they glean their statistics. I do not deny global warming exists, only that mankind is the primary cause. We might be the tipping point, but the global warming argument is a little like saying dinosaurs were responsible for the last ice age. Certainly greenhouse gases contribute and as populations in industrialized countries grow, they will continue to worsen the problem. How about being proactive about how we deal with the changes? Adjust to nature, don’t spend so much time and energy trying to alter it. Don’t build houses 100 yards from the ocean, use light reflecting roofing material; figure out how to more effectively harness solar energy. Only CNN could transform this into a political issue. And leave the Republicans alone, they’ve got enough problems trying to extricate themselves from the Dark Ages without this kind of nonsense. Speaking of the Dark Ages, kudos to bible-thumping Rick Santorum and his pointy headed cronies for scuttling that latest international handicap treaty. Speaking of bad press and climate change, The Weather Channel reported last week (again) that an unusual volume of ice is melting in Greenland, and it was suggested that if the rapid melt persists, Santa might need to find a new headquarters. Of course the goings on at the North Pole are top secret, but my sources tell me that a significant number of elves have drowned in unexpected ice flow disasters. Great, another move offshore. What happens when Santa starts to outsource; I mean, do they even have elves in China? Fun fact: Did you know they EAT reindeer in Finland? Tastes a little like chicken I’m told.



What else … Jazz pianist Dave Brubeck died last week, just short of his 92^nd birthday. Perhaps he didn’t have the “chops” of Tyner or Peterson, but he was a good composer. I have a rare recording of Brubeck playing The Tralfamadore Café in Buffalo back in the mid 80s, which I taped from a radio broadcast. Buffalo sax great Bobby Militello was playing with him in that concert and it is one of my most prized live recordings. As for the economy, I’m told we’re about to do some financial base jumping. Although I don’t really understand the “fiscal cliff” I know one thing. All that political grandstanding to make the other side look bad makes both sides look like children. If you believe the news, the end result will be that these buffoons send the global economy into a tailspin. Big storms in the Philippines (250,000 in shelters) an earthquake in Japan, 500 km north of Tokyo, flooding in Beunos Aires, snow in Brussels and France … and rain in the Great White North. With Georgian Bay a little warmer than normal, we could see some serius lake effect snow over the next few months. Prince William and Kate are expecting, 19 months after they wed. What took them so long? Wasn’t that a horrible story about that nurse who was fooled into believing that a couple of mischievous Australian Djs were royals? While she may have erred in providing the sensitive information, I can’t understand why someone would commit suicide over the mistake. Final ray of sunshine … 43 % of the NHL hockey season has now been scrapped. Ho friggin‘ ho.

Wouldn’t it be weird if Santa were Finnish?

　

Written by Jamie Oppenheimer c2012 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED