Down in Buffalo last week for a meeting with the estate lawyer and some other people, I spent the week sorting through more papers and personal effects, making the difficult decisions about what to keep and what to toss. So many photographs! And everywhere there are notes, postcards, or letters in Mom’s or Dad’s handwriting. Dad wrote so many things down. He had one little notebook I found in his desk describing various fox hunts in which he participated. Why did he do that for heaven’s sake? These days, we’d call those accounts “tweets” excepting that I’m not sure for whom those unspectacular notes were intended. I suspect that the ever popular Kim Kardashian has a much bigger following. “I like just bought the most bitchin’ shoes!”
Somehow, I had compartmentalized the loss of my parents. Of course I grieved when they passed away, but a little voice in the back of my head said “Stay focused, there’s a lot to get done now.” Gradually, what was our home for over fifty years is now being struck down like a stage set. My childhood home is now a real estate listing, and that is just now starting to soak in. With Thanksgiving fast approaching, and given that this was my favorite holiday of the year, the one I was lucky enough to spend every one of the last 53 years celebrating at 140 Chapin Pkwy, Thanksgiving 2011 is going to be weird. Cleaning out the freezer I found some turkey stuffing from last year’s celebration, and I thought I’d take it up to Katrine to have on Thanksgiving this year, but like so many things I left behind, it’s still in that freezer.
Here’s an interesting story. While I was down last week, our listing agent called me up to warn me that she’d be walking some people from the Buffalo News through the house. They are going to be featuring the house in an upcoming weekend real estate publication called Home Finder and they wanted to walk through to take some pictures. I have an aversion to history that dates back to several insufferably boring history teachers I had in high school, and I have never really learned much about our house. Strange, considering I’d lived there for 25 years of my life. It turns out that the architect, Edward Austin Kent, who designed many of the prominent buildings in Buffalo, was also noteworthy for being the one and only Buffalonian to perish on the Titanic in 1912. Our house was built in 1911, and it was likely one of Kent’s last commissions. The story goes that when Kent, who by all accounts acted heroically in the last hours of his life, was helping an elderly lady named Mrs. Helen Candee onto one of the few lifeboats available, she handed him an ivory miniature of her mother to hold onto in his final hours. Mrs. Candee survived, and later, when Kent’s body was recovered, the ivory miniature was found in his pocket, and subsequently returned to her. History means much more to me when it becomes the story of exceptional individuals.
Mini rant. With the latest debt crises in Europe, it is clear to most people with even a tenuous grasp on reality that the party is over. Austerity measures are painful and widespread. Fortunes have and will continue to be lost. Still, there are riots in the streets and everyone seems to think that this is someone else’s problem. Chris Collins, the Republican now ex- Erie County Executive was given his walking papers last Tuesday night when he was defeated by pro-union Democrat, Country Comptroller Mark Poloncarnz. Had I not been down in Buffalo on election day, I probably wouldn’t have blinked an eye, but this particular election was to me symbolic of what is broken in American (and world) politics. I defy our proposed leaders to actually do the unpopular thing and lead. So far I have not seen a presidential candidate who comes close to fitting the bill. Clearly, we’re all going to pay more taxes and services will be cut; I simply want someone to show some responsibility and state clearly how we can navigate through this mess. I’ll wager that most of the uncertainty in financial markets is directly related to the fear that leaders don’t know how or are too afraid to make the tough decisions. Collins treated Erie County like a business, and he made a lot of unpopular decisions. He was by many accounts, arrogant and not very likable. As best I can tell, Collins lost because he cut spending in Erie County and didn’t sugar coat the pain. He did what he said he was going to do, and that is apparently political suicide. He lost the beauty contest. I will be interested to see if Mr. Poloncarnz improves the welfare of the residents of Erie County by keeping his campaign promises.
This year, my Thanksgiving will be a tribute to the memory of my parents. Mom and Dad, thank you for making my life so wonderful. No more whining (for now). Nothing lasts forever: it’s time to form new traditions. Written by Jamie Oppenheimer c 2011 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
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