Merry Christmas to my twelve loyal readers! I did not
feel the frenzied consumerism this year that I have felt in years past. That’s,
a good thing, right? Christmas should
be about family, and reunions, and selfless good deeds, and wretched excess
followed by both hands on the “porcelain bus.” Funny, because last week, I posted
a report from the distant past, wherein I decried the rise of materialism, and
the uselessness of items like the Ronco food dehydrator. Twenty-one years
later, not only do I own a food dehydrator, but I use it frequently. I draw the
line at salad shooters though. Remember those things? And what ever happened to
the “Flow-Bee”, those suck-n-cut vacuum hair cutters?
Last night, as is my Christmas tradition, I watched “It’s
A Wonderful Life” for about the two hundredth time. I cry every time I see that
movie, and every year I notice something new. My sister bought me a book about
the filming of the movie, which I read with some interest and then proceeded to
forget. It’s full of interesting facts about the cast and interesting anecdotes about production. For instance, H.B. Warner, the man who played Mr. Gower, got a bit
tipsy to be “in character” for scene wherein he’s supposed to be drunk. Now that’s devotion to your art. Anyhow,
tonight I was watching the movie, and somewhere near the end of George Bailey’s
nightmarish epiphany, wherein he discovers what the world would have been like
had he never been born, there is a scene that always makes me chuckle. George
runs out of the bar after he confronts and terrifies the “old maid” Donna Reed,
and Burt the cop starts shooting rather recklessly at him as he runs
desperately down the street. Burt just shoots away, completely disregarding public
safety, and people are ducking because they’re in the line of fire! Talk about bad
police work; thank goodness there were no cell phones back then. So much of
that film is probably considered offensive by today’s standards. The portrayal
of the lovable Bailey family cook Annie is overtly racist. Alcoholism is, at
least in Uncle Billy’s case, considered amusing and acceptable behavior. Talk
about your Irish stereotype.
Every year around the holidays, there are photos and
videos of houses lit up for the seasons, and every year the displays seem to
get more elaborate. I heard a story on the news about one guy who was forced to
shut his light show down because the controller which coordinated the lights
and music was somehow interfering with air traffic controllers. Some of those
LED displays are quite spectacular. Christmas lights are my favorite part of
the season.
As we approach the New Year, of course the year-in-review
shows have begun. Last Sunday, CNN’s Farred Zakaria featured “experts” debating
the pros and cons of 2018. Are we headed for Armageddon, or is this The Golden
Age? Right now, thanks in part to the Orange Emperor’s irresponsible use of
social media, the stock market is tanking, the Federal Government has shut down,
Defense Secretary General James Mattis, arguably the last adult in the room,
has quit over differences with the bellicose Commander-In-Tweet, and natural
disasters abound, the latest being a volcano-precipitated tsunami (who knew that
was a thing?) that wiped out hundreds in Indonesia. In general, the world seems
to be coming unhinged. Santa, if you’re listening, I have the same request as
last year (and every year before that): peace on earth, a lot less hatred, and
a little more love. Oh, yes, and could someone point me toward the truth? One
last request: a fistful of itching powder sprinkled into Rump’s briefs just
before his next self-serving public rally. To all my loyal readers, I hope you have a Merry Christmas
today, and many more happy healthy ones to come.
Ho,Ho,Ho! and don’t be one!
- Written by Jamie Oppenheimer c 2018 ALL RIGHTS
RESERVED
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