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| My '57 Chris Craft Sea Skiff : "Ahoy Vey" |
When I was younger, the Fourth of July was a big deal for me. All up and
down the North Shore of Lake Erie, near our summer cottage, one could see the
fireworks displays and bonfires. Back in the wild west days of my youth,
someone in my band of delinquents would inevitably get a hold of some serious construction
grade explosives, and we would have fun waking up the neighbors. Alcohol was
very likely involved; it’s a wonder we are all still alive and relatively intact.
When I think about my ill-spent youth, this applies to a lot of different scenarios
wherein danger was a key component. These days, the most dangerous thing I do is
to occasionally drive the moose-lined highways of Northern, Ontario at night.
In my early years, we used to watch the big fireworks display at nearby Crystal
Beach Amusement Park and sometimes, we’d take a boat or car into Buffalo to
watch the shows there. One year was particularly memorable and it involved a
fireworks presentation in the Buffalo harbor, hosted by the makers of Whisk laundry
detergent. I and some of my friends piled into my 1957 Chris Craft Sea Skiff utility
and motored into Buffalo to catch the much-touted fireworks show. It was a dark,
choppy ride in from the Canadian shore and when we arrived in Buffalo, we
dropped anchor near a break wall, careful not to moor within the channel of the
Buffalo ship canal. As show time approached – I believe there was music on
shore as well – more and more scofflaw boaters began to moor within the channel
(clearly marked with lighted buoys), and obviously some of them were imbibing
heavily. There was a lot of hooting and drunken laughter and some of the
drunken attendees were firing off hand-held Roman Candles, aiming them at other
boaters. Gasoline and fire; brilliant. At one point, one of those bozos inadvertently
took aim at the police boat, which was fighting a losing battle to keep the
channel clear for its intended purpose. Two notable things happened that night.
First, a large sailboat under power rammed into one of the stern corners of my
boat. As soon as it hit us, they turned off their running lights, as if that
was somehow going to make them invisible. I could hear a kid onboard saying “I
told you not to let Mommy drive!” Fiberglass is no match for Philippine mahogany,
and the sailboat lost that fight. Not so much as a scratch on my boat; big hole
in the bow of the sailboat. The next
boating disaster involved the afore-mentioned scofflaws, many who were giving the
outgunned police boat fits. All at once, the mighty Miss Buffalo came motoring
through the canal, on a collision course with all the fools who had moored
improperly in her path. She rammed a few as they scrambled unsuccessfully to
get out of the way, and she picked up the mooring lines of many more who were
not able to pull up and move away in time. Picture this 150’+ craft barreling through
at 5-10 knots, dragging behind it five or ten small craft frantically trying to
cut their mooring lines, as they banged and smashed into each other in the churning
wake. All the responsible, sober boaters gave out a collective cheer and
applauded. Karma is a bitch. Things have tightened up a bit since the 80’s, but
back then, there were a lot amateurs
out on the high seas.
On my show last Thursday night ,I made note of a documentary we watched
on CNN entitled I’ll Be Me which covered
singer/song writer Glen Campbell’s recent and final concert tour. Campbell, who
was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease a while back, had made the brave
decision, along with his wife and kids, to shine a bright light on his decline,
and I thought the documentary was remarkably good. Never before a huge fan of
Campbell’s music, I did respect his ability to write hit songs, and I am a much
bigger fan of his music having seen this documentary. Some might say this was an
inappropriate and unseemly airing of a person’s private struggle, but as a
family member who has first-hand experienced the remarkable challenges dementia
throws at all the family members, I applaud the Campbells for playing out their
experience in the public eye. As is the case with so many other kinds of mental
illness, silence is our worst enemy. This documentary humanized the struggles of
this very public celebrity, and I am sure it did a great service to all the
people who are trying deal with this disease personally, not to mention all the
researchers who are laboring to find a treatment or a cure.
Again, I hope you all had a wonderful Canada Day and/or Fourth of July,
and that you all still have your fingers and toes intact.
-Written by Jamie Oppenheimer c2015 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED-
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